The Lifegiver Blog

The Power of Perspective (as seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

According to the 2015 Annual Military Lifestyle Survey by Blue Star Families, 60% of spouses reported that employment was a top stressor in their life.  This is not surprising, as our culture of spouses includes those who want a sense

The One Thing That Could Change Your Relationship (as seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

Forgiveness is easily misunderstood.  We expect it from others but struggle with giving it.  And let’s not forget the struggle with forgiving yourself!  That can be the most difficult!  The burden of shame seems much easier to carry than the

Spouses, Mental Health and the Civilian Divide

(Written 4/10/2014) This week, I attended a Mental Health Conference Sponsored by Give An Hour on treating the needs of military members, veterans, and their families.  You may have not heard of Give and Hour, or some of the many

Gratitude Rolled in Sugar (As seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

A military couple sat on opposite ends of my couch.  I asked what was going on and how I could help.  The wife said she felt weary from the responsibilities at home and felt taken for granted.  He snapped back

Overcoming Fear

Sometimes it feels like fear and anxiety go hand in hand with the life of a military spouse.  No matter what branch your family serves in, it seems that worry sails the ship when we are faced with so many

Don’t Survive… Thrive (as seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

It was two days before our first deployment and the anticipation was nauseating.  It was our last chance for a date before he headed off to Afghanistan.  There were so many unknowns, so many emotions and not enough words to

After the Affair

While the world is waiting to hear how much of the Ashley Madison leak is real, there are thousands of couples that are squirming in their seats.  Some are tempted to sift through the email addresses just in case there

Fear in your Marriage

I can admit that fear holds a special place in my life, but not because I want it there.  In a moment’s notice, fear can take over an innocent conversation with my husband and turn it into a battleground. We

The Fallacy American Parents Believe

I read the results of a poll of 100,000 parents featured on the Today Show. Parents were polled on what they felt were the appropriate ages to let their children, “tweens” and teens, do things like get a Facebook page,

Finding Home Again

It is our turn to move again.  If you haven’t heard me talk about it, #TeamWeathers is on the road again to our next location. This one will only be for a year, our shortest yet, while Matt is in

Protecting Your Marriage From an Affair

Matt and I see it all the time, a couple comes in for help after an emotional or physical affair and he/she says “I never thought it would go that far.”  Protecting your marriage from an affair is crucial to

What Military Spouses are Unwilling to Say

There is no doubt that serving as a military spouse is honorable and meaningful.  While our soldiers train and perform brilliant and complex missions, the military is clear that it is the families at home that provide the stability for

Moms, Meltdowns, & Cupcakes

It was the last week of school, my last week of work, and we were getting ready to move (again) in a month.  Everything seemed to be peaking into this nice opportunity for a meltdown.  I was late getting teacher’s

PCS and the 6 Month Mark

6 months.   It is a significant mark in time and am realizing that it means even more to a military spouse.  Here are just a few: During a pregnancy it is the time when the energetic second trimester is over,

My Response to Conscious UnCoupling

It’s conscious uncoupling that prevents families from being broken by divorce and creates expanded families that continue to function in a healthy way outside of traditional marriage. Before we unpack Conscious Uncoupling and how it effects our view of marriage

Joy In Between

I have a great friend who every year thinks and prays about a word that she will focus on for the new year.  It seems to have brought her great focus on the past years and I have been thinking

A Woman’s Mind

When Matt and I talk about some of the differences between men and women, we often refer to the computer screen as a perfect metaphor.  Of course, we are not trying to label people or say that everyone is the

When its Time to Leave

I love being a military spouse.  It provides an opportunity to travel, be part of something bigger than myself, and serve along side my soldier.  Balancing out the bright moments are the darker difficult days of relocating, adjusting, and times

Who is the Child, Who is the Parent?

There is nothing like our kids to bring out, well, the kid in us.  And I’m not talking about being playful.  What I’m referring to is arguing like a child.  Children, tweens, and teens will always frustrate us and bring

Desperately Seeking “Her”

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about wishing I could find the woman who can do it all.  It seems like it’s a daily fight to balance everything as a mom, wife, and professional.  I really want to find the

On Becoming a Lifegiving Woman

Have you ever met a woman who was gentle, warm, inviting, and peaceful.  One whom you walked into her presence and melted?  I read a book a while back called “Lifegiving” by Tammy Maltby.  It’s hard to find now, only


You know… there are few things that invoke awe in me. I post tons of pictures hoping that it can communicate our life here or stir emotion in someone the way it may for me in real life. Usually, I

Guilty for Stealing Joy

Through waves and clouds and storms, He gently clears the way Wait because in His time, so shall this night Soon end in joy, soon end in joy Soon end in joy, soon end in joy. ~ Jars of Clay,

Father’s Day

So Happy Father’s Day to all of you who have created little ones, want to, or have chosen to father the fatherless. Much has been written about the importance of fatherhood. As crucial as it is to have a mother,


When I first started Seminary, I started out as a Masters of Divinity student. After one semester, and an almost nervous breakdown, I realized I was not supposed to go for that degree. One of the classes that led up

“How am I supposed to know what God wants me to do when I have so many ideas in my head?”

Finding and Keeping our Calling… I had someone ask me the other day, “How am I supposed to know what God wants me to do when I have so many ideas in my head?”  Wow, have I ever been there! 

How to Discern God’s Will

A simple approach to discerning God’s will for your life.  Inspired from the work of Alice Cullinan, PhD. “Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is- his good, pleasing, and perfect will.” Romans 12:2 In

Finding Purpose

We are all searching for a sense of purpose. We want our efforts to be worth something.  Unfortunately, that can often leave women exhausted and over-committed.  Perhaps it’s time to re-evaluate. “You are overwhelmed,” my husband said to me.  “You


We are often reminded to “remain” in the presence of God- that we will find peace and comfort there.  How would we approach that concept if we knew it was command? “Let your roots grow down into Him, and let

What About Him?

A surprising lesson about minding my own business, I mean “story”, after reading “The Chronicles of Narnia” with my boys. It’s not everyday that we get a word from the Lord regarding our future. Most of us live in a

Breaking the Silence

What is going on while God is silent?  Is it me?  Is it Him?  Why can’t I hear Him? We have a human tendency to automatically assume that silence means we have wronged God or that he has abandoned us.

For the Brokenhearted at Christmas

I took my dog for a walk.  Going outside into the fresh air seems to always wake me up from racing, disorganized thoughts.  Walking around my new neighborhood here in Augusta, I reflected on my year.  It has been a

Play Therapy at Home: Day 13 Teenagers and Feelings

I realize it’s been a long time since I’ve written.  Life happens and you have to make room for it.  In the time that has gone by, though I have some new things to address.  I’ve done several basic play

Play Therapy at Home, Day 12: Parent with PTSD

I have been thinking about this topic for a while.  My counseling practice tends to run in themes.  Sometimes a majority of my clients are dealing with loss, sometimes domestic violence, and lately parents struggling with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Play Therapy at Home, Day 11: Fear and Loss

I have been thinking a lot about loss this week.  Not only are some of your families dealing with loss in various ways, Fort Stewart lost more soldiers this week in Afghanistan.  I used to refer grief issues to other

Play Therapy at Home, Day 10: Anxiety

This is the half way mark!  It’s hard to believe, it has been such a wonderful journey- and easier than I thought.  In fact, the hardest part is finding the time to blog about it and design the page.  In

Play Therapy at Home, Day 9: Distracted, Games for Attention Building

I know I’m not the only one who has a child that struggles with attention.  As we approach the first week of school in two weeks, I know what’s coming.  The first month, the new teacher will talk to me

Play Therapy at Home, Day 8: Drawing

I held off as long as I could before doing drawing. Drawing is one of the easiest things you can do with your child and in play therapy! Today was a day of drawing self image portraits with the option

Play Therapy at Home, Day 7: Sand

Well, I tried to coordinate “sand day” for the beach- but then I guess it’s a good thing that it didn’t work out that way because not everyone reading this has access to a beach!!  More of you probably have

Play Therapy at Home, Day 6: Story Time

I love story time.  To be honest, I have gotten away from it a little.  I used to be so good at laying down with my children at night and listening to them read.  What a joy it is to