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Lifegiver

Tag Archives: marriage

S5E10: Tips & Perspective from a NG Spouse (Cierra)

My good friend Cierra joins the podcast to talk about her experiences as a National Guard spouse.  We so often hear about the challenges of National Guard families- that they don’t have access to the programming active duty families have

S5E3: Marriage Makes Us All Better

Bree Carroll is an engineer using her skills as an event coordinator and wedding planner. Bree saw some marriages around her fail mostly due to a lack of resources to help them get through the challenges they faced. The resources

A Marriage Check Up With Dr. Les Parrott

Dr. Les Parrott joins me for an episode that is all about how couples can use a tool like the Better Love Assessment to get a healthy snapshot or check-up on their marriage. Dr. Parrott is a globally sought after

The Impact of Family Readiness on Marriage

Matt joins me again for another episode where we talk about the impact of Family Readiness on the marriage. For years, decades even, the military has told families that their support makes the mission successful. Unfortunately, families are getting tired

Communicating Through Change/PCS

Join Matt and I on a Saturday afternoon over coffee where we talk about our recent PCS (relocation). We talk about how it affected each of us, our marriage, kids, and ideas for how you can communicate through big changes

My Strategy for Affair Recovery: How to Move from Crisis to Intimacy Again

Betrayal is unfortunately more common than you think- especially in the service culture. In this episode, I share with you the strategy I use to help couples work through affair recovery. There are three phases and couples will certainly stall,

Addiction & Marriage

When a good friend approached me and asked why I had not addressed addiction and alcoholism on the podcast yet, I didn’t have an answer. I could not believe this topic had not yet been covered. As Alyssa and I

My Spouse Doesn’t Care About My Feelings

We often hear from couples that the service lifestyle has made my spouse “cold, calculated, and harsh.” While this may be a nature versus nurture debate, the service lifestyle can definitely train a person to see the world in a

What’s Going On Down There? Women’s Health

Ok- so first a heads up- we are going there in this episode. We will be talking all about the female anatomy! Guys- this one is for you, too. There is so much women are not educated on and the

Ethan the Strong: A Story of Faith & Courage in the Midst of Loss

This is the second Sunday Special in Season 4 where we have honest conversations around faith in the midst of the service lifestyle. In this episode, I’m introducing you to Jim and Ashley, an Army chaplain couple, who recently went

S4 Ep 3 OPSEC: Keeping your Family and Mission Safe

(WATCH or LISTEN to this episode!) Safety and security is more important than ever.  In a time where foreign adversaries are actively targeting and using American social media accounts, we need all the help we can get to keep our

Living Out Your Strengths Series

Part 1: Be Confident in Your Superpowers In this series, join Katie Christy and I as we completely nerd-out on the power of living out your strengths. All of us are good at something. None of us are good at

Remember These 5 Things Next Time You Fight With Your Spouse (as seen on Military.com)

It might sound crazy, but conflict in your marriage can be a healthy sign. Two people who see the world in very different ways are never going to agree on everything. Too often, couples let marriage fighting spin wildly out

Try Some Extra Kindness in Your Marriage (As seen on Military.com)

During a particularly difficult week, I scrolled through Facebook and paused on a post reporting that a local Starbucks gave out customers’ orders for free with no explanation. Baristas answered inquiries with merely “Have a wonderful day.” Even though I

Stellar Spouse: As seen on Military.com

I already knew I had a stellar soldier for a husband- but right then I kinda hated it.  Perhaps you have one too.  The kind of spouse that strives to be his best at everything and sets his sights on

Sin in a Christian Marriage

“How do I confront my spouse’s negative behavior?” “What does it look like to be a godly wife when my husband has stopped caring?” “Is God is okay with me ending my marriage?” “How do I continue to love and serve

Who Is Really the Problem Here? The Reintegration Battle (Military.com)

When I came home from my extended business trip, it was clear: My husband and our boys had together adopted a new world and language. My trip was longer than most I’ve done recently, and my husband had held down

Tips for a Happy Military Marriage (Military.com)

What if we make marriage a lot harder than it needs to be? What if I told you there are a few tips for a happy marriage you can follow to easily bring intimacy and closeness back to your relationship?

Military Marriage: When to Separate (Military.com)

How do you know when to separate from your spouse or when to call it quits? In almost every scenario, I tell a couple to fight for their relationship. Too often, I see couples give up. It’s one of the reasons I

So You’ve Hit a Marriage Setback: 3 Steps (Military.com)

We all have hope for a marriage that lasts and is fulfilling. What we often don’t expect is how hard it will be when we disagree with our spouse on important values, military marriage problems or finding ourselves moving at

How to Be a Wonder Woman in Your Military Marriage (Military.com)

It was a silly thing to fight over, especially since it was an argument about fitting as much joy as possible into a Florida Disney family vacation. I, led by my “mom-guilt,” argued that our boys had wanted to go

Sex and Military Marriage: It’s Complicated (Military.com)

Let’s talk about sex. One of the most beautiful ways we love our spouses is through sexuality. It’s also one of the most emotionally complicated. Popular culture portrays it as simple, spontaneous and very uncomplicated, but I assure you most

3 Ways to Change Your Military Marriage Story (Military.com)

When I look back on the years of my military marriage, I see it as a bookshelf lined with memories. The deployment years are a lot like survival stories. Reintegration seems like a classic drama. There are pages with hurt,

Real Military Love: This Is Going to Hurt (Military.com)

There are two sides. Neither listen. Both are determined they are right. No, I’m not talking about politics or the tone in our country. I’m talking about marriage and military love. (But perhaps what I’m about to say could help

The Power of the ‘Sacred Space’ in Military Marriage (Military.com)

The gap between my husband and me felt as wide as the Grand Canyon. Desperate to give it clarity, we called each life-changing moment that had over time created it a “sacred space.” Let’s be real. After my husband’s first

No More Footsie: When Military Marriage Is a Fight, Not a Love Fest (Military.com)

I recently watched as my cousin and his new fiancée constantly held each other, looked at each other, and played “footsie” under the table. The beginning years of a relationship are filled with face-to-face moments in which the rest of

Is This the Secret to Military Love that Lasts? (Military.com)

Wartime has been the guest in my home (and likely yours) that has long overstayed its welcome. Yet, as a military couple, we chose a lifestyle of service to our country that includes adding a seat at the table and

When Your Spouse Doesn’t Want to get Help (As seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

One of the biggest challenges we can face as a military spouse is when our service member comes home different from deployment. Although thousands of service members return every year unscathed, even the most boring deployment causes a couple to

#PowerofMarriage (As seen in MSM- March)

Recommitting can never come too late or too often.  With Spring around the corner, it reminds us that life can come out of the harshest of seasons, even when you think there is no life left.  Seasons will come in

Intimate Influence (As Seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

By now, you hopefully know me well enough to trust me as I address a topic that many couples are afraid to talk about- SEX!  Although I can’t cover everything, I thought I would tackle the most common issues I

The Power of Perspective (as seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

According to the 2015 Annual Military Lifestyle Survey by Blue Star Families, 60% of spouses reported that employment was a top stressor in their life.  This is not surprising, as our culture of spouses includes those who want a sense

The One Thing That Could Change Your Relationship (as seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

Forgiveness is easily misunderstood.  We expect it from others but struggle with giving it.  And let’s not forget the struggle with forgiving yourself!  That can be the most difficult!  The burden of shame seems much easier to carry than the

Spouses, Mental Health and the Civilian Divide

(Written 4/10/2014) This week, I attended a Mental Health Conference Sponsored by Give An Hour on treating the needs of military members, veterans, and their families.  You may have not heard of Give and Hour, or some of the many

Gratitude Rolled in Sugar (As seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

A military couple sat on opposite ends of my couch.  I asked what was going on and how I could help.  The wife said she felt weary from the responsibilities at home and felt taken for granted.  He snapped back

Overcoming Fear

Sometimes it feels like fear and anxiety go hand in hand with the life of a military spouse.  No matter what branch your family serves in, it seems that worry sails the ship when we are faced with so many

Don’t Survive… Thrive (as seen in Military Spouse Magazine)

It was two days before our first deployment and the anticipation was nauseating.  It was our last chance for a date before he headed off to Afghanistan.  There were so many unknowns, so many emotions and not enough words to

After the Affair

While the world is waiting to hear how much of the Ashley Madison leak is real, there are thousands of couples that are squirming in their seats.  Some are tempted to sift through the email addresses just in case there

Fear in your Marriage

I can admit that fear holds a special place in my life, but not because I want it there.  In a moment’s notice, fear can take over an innocent conversation with my husband and turn it into a battleground. We

My Response to Conscious UnCoupling

It’s conscious uncoupling that prevents families from being broken by divorce and creates expanded families that continue to function in a healthy way outside of traditional marriage. Before we unpack Conscious Uncoupling and how it effects our view of marriage

A Woman’s Mind

When Matt and I talk about some of the differences between men and women, we often refer to the computer screen as a perfect metaphor.  Of course, we are not trying to label people or say that everyone is the