The Lifegiver Podcast for Military & First Responder Marriages
The Lifegiver Podcast for Service Marriages is hosted by Corie Weathers, a Clinical Military and First Responder Consultant. Corie started off her career as a licensed professional counselor serving families behind confidential doors. After a few years of working with service families, she found common themes that she wanted to address on a much bigger scale. The Lifegiver Podcast was launched as a way to start a much broader conversation. Each episode tackles a topic or interview that relates to the military and/or first responder lifestyle as well as marriage enrichment.
We are celebrating the end of Season 4 with a big question that likely everyone has asked: “Who is really in charge?” Is it man? Is it God? When does God get in involved? Why doesn’t he? Perhaps you are waiting on orders to your next assignment (like we are) and wondering if the people involved are listening to God. Or maybe you are praying for a promotion or for your spouse to turn back to God. Some of you may have even experienced abuse at the hands of someone else and are wondering, “Why didn’t God intervene?” In this Sunday Special, I open up on my own journey to look into the sovereignty of God and tackle these big questions by diving into what scripture says about it. Thank you for a fantastic Season 4! Included in this episode: A portion of James Corden’s “The Late Late Show.” To listen to the full video, watch here: Kanye West Airpool Karaoke
We are nearing the end of Season 4 with a fantastic interview with Vernice Castillo of Military Spouse Advocacy Network (MSAN)! There is no one better to talk about the importance and trend of mentoring than Vernice. In this episode, we come full circle from Episode 1 with a discussion on how mentoring in our military and first responder culture is impacting the wellbeing of so many military spouses who are reporting issues of loneliness, fatigue, exhaustion, and resentment. Listen in and allow Vernice to remind you of why face-to-face is so much more fulfilling than online connection. It might open your eyes to what you’ve been missing. If you would like more information on how you can get involved with MSAN, click here: https://www.militaryspouseadvocacynetwork.org/ To listen to a previous episode on mentoring and the various generational shifts, listen to my previous episode: The Village.
Get ready to take some notes!! This episode is LONG overdue and chock full of so much information. I get asked weekly, “How do I find a clinician?” “What do I search for?” “How will I know if they are a good fit?” For years I dug into Psychology Profiles and even websites looking for clinicians that were not only competent, but understood the service lifestyle. This year, I launched the Lifegiver Clinician Directory – the first ever searchable directory and database of clinicians that have a passion to serve you. Some of them are even first responders, spouses, and veterans! Now you can find someone using the map or search fields to find the kind of provider that works for your family! In this episode I also cover: How to know if you need counseling The difference between a counselor, psychiatrist, and psychologist The different types of counseling and treatments My experience with EMDR What I look for in a clinician How to handle your counseling relationship when it doesn’t feel like a good fit Stay tuned, Season 4 is coming to a close soon. Listen in as I talk about the vision for Season 5!!!
Becky Hoy from Brave Crates joins the podcast to share how you can better your marriage even when you are apart. Becky Hoy believes that deployment is one of the best things that has ever happened for the growth of her marriage and her own personal development. As an Army spouse whose husband has been deployed or otherwise away from home for roughly half of their seven years of marriage, Becky realized quickly that wishing away the days during deployment could not be an option for her. To share this message with other spouses, Becky founded Brave Crate. She shares weekly tips and inspiration as a blogger for Brave Blog and has curated the deployment-positive support community for military spouses called Brave Board. ABOUT BRAVE CRATE For military spouses, counting down to being reunited with their deployed service member can feel like a never ending journey! That’s why each month Brave Crate sends a box of curated self-development and personal wellness products that allow her to shift her focus away from counting the days and onto setting goals and finding joy – so she can conquer the deployment countdown and meet her spouse at homecoming as the strongest and most resilient version of herself. To find out more about how you can subscribe to Brave Crates or gift someone else, head over to www.bravecrates.com
Dr. Les Parrott joins me for an episode that is all about how couples can use a tool like the Better Love Assessment to get a healthy snapshot or check-up on their marriage. Dr. Parrott is a globally sought after marriage psychologist along with his wife, Leslie Parrott, also a marriage therapist. Together, they have written several books and speak on how to improve your marriage communication, reduce conflict, improve your sex life, and much more. In this episode, Dr. Parrott shares more about how the Better Love Assessment (found at www.betterlove.com) can point out the individual strengths in your marriage. Better Love can be a great tool for date night discussions, working on your marriage during a deployment or separation, and even ways to talk through topics that are normally hot topics. To find out more and subscribe to Dr. Parrott’s resources, check out www.lesandleslie.com.
Matt joins me again for another episode where we talk about the impact of Family Readiness on the marriage. For years, decades even, the military has told families that their support makes the mission successful. Unfortunately, families are getting tired and are wondering at what cost. In this episode, Matt and I have an honest conversation on how families indeed play a part in mission readiness but also how we can change our perspective to a more influential one that can change the trajectory of our entire family.
Most of us know that there are stories of war in the Bible, but what does it say about the warriors? In this Sunday Special, we take a look at a specific warrior in God’s story and the impact of war on his life. We will address the tough topic of “What does it mean to have blood on your hands?” What does that say about you? Your marriage? When you are asked to be the good in the world, face evil, but to do so requires the willingness to take a life? Scripture actually addresses this and I’m excited to share with you what I’ve found.
In this Sunday Special, we address the biggest faith question I get during affair recovery, which is how and when do I forgive? Of course this is a difficult question to answer depending on the damage that has been done. Join me as I walk with you through scripture that gives us a blueprint for forgiveness and hope for restoration. I address: God’s purpose and design for marriage How and why the enemy wants to destroy your marriage What Jesus says about when to forgive, and How we are not called to repeatedly forgive without boundaries Sunday Specials on the Lifegiver Podcast are a chance for us to dive deeper into honest conversations regarding our faith and topics that come up in our marriage. In the last episode of the Lifegiver Podcast, I shared with you my strategy for affair recovery. If you haven’t heard that episode, listen to it here: https://www.podbean.com/eu/pb-5jwg4-b63b20
Join Matt and I on a Saturday afternoon over coffee where we talk about our recent PCS (relocation). We talk about how it affected each of us, our marriage, kids, and ideas for how you can communicate through big changes your own family goes through. Referenced in this talk is a previous episode on Resiliency and Maslow’s Ladder.
Betrayal is unfortunately more common than you think- especially in the service culture. In this episode, I share with you the strategy I use to help couples work through affair recovery. There are three phases and couples will certainly stall, if not fail, in recovering their marriage if they miss important steps throughout the phases. Two people, if are both willing to work hard, can rebuild their marriage after an affair and go on to have a rich relationship. Here are some of the resources mentioned throughout the episode: My interview with Dr. Mike Sytsma Here is also my podcast on “Sin in a Christian Marriage” Part 1 & Part 2 More Resources: • Torn Asunder by Dave Carder. There is also a workbook available for this book. (faith based) • Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity by Gary & Mona Shriver (faith based) • Secrets to Surviving Infidelity by Scott Haltzman • After the Affair by Janis Spring Rebuilding Trust Video – Using the image of a “trust bucket,” Dr. Mike addresses rebuilding trust after an affair. Setbacks in Marriage- The Podcast Episode Women & the Tough Bible Verses– (Topic of Submission and gender roles in the Bible- Authentic Intimacy) People Are More Important Than Marriage– Authentic Intimacy, When you shouldn’t fight for your marriage Sexual Intimacy and Post Affair with Mike Sytsma How do Affairs Happen? New Life Church, Brady Boyd Articles: So You’ve Hit a Marriage Setback: 3 Steps Military Marriage: When to Separate Mike Sytsma- Betrayal & Affair Recovery (articles and video) Protecting Your Marriage from an Affair Books: Mission Ready Marriage: My Life As An Active Duty Wife Claire Wood Sacred Spaces: My Journey to the Heart of Military Marriage Corie Weathers
In this Sunday Special, I talk with Megan Brown, the If Gathering Military Outreach Communicator. Basically, that means she loves Jesus and loves to get people excited about Him. I met Megan (officially) at the AFI Military Spouse of the Year Awards 2019, but I’ve been watching her for some time. Her personality is as colorful as she is! After hearing her lead a couple of morning devotionals, I knew I wanted to have her on the podcast. In this episode, Megan shares the importance of friendship in this crazy military lifestyle as a “life or death” importance. Listen in as she shares how community and boundaries can breathe life into us from a biblical perspective. Go here to find out more about If Gathering Military
When a good friend approached me and asked why I had not addressed addiction and alcoholism on the podcast yet, I didn’t have an answer. I could not believe this topic had not yet been covered. As Alyssa and I talked, she shared with me that she had searched everywhere for solid information on how to address alcohol addiction in her marriage. Ultimately, I invited her to courageously share her story. In this two-part interview, Alyssa shares how alcohol in the service culture impacts so many marriages and families and how she approached her husband on his drinking. There are many different ways that alcohol, pornography, or other addictions can destroy your marriage. We won’t be able to address addiction from all sides in this interview; however, I am so proud of how Alyssa handled her situation. Alyssa does a fantastic job of not only respecting her husband and marriage, but also modeling healthy boundaries, asking for change, and supporting her husband through his recovery. If you are struggling with addiction, or your spouse is, there is help out there. No couple should approach a situation like this alone. Counseling, the military ASAP program, and 12-Step Programs in your area can provide the help you need to navigate the complexity of addiction and recovery.
Welcome to another Sunday Special! I am so happy to bring back my good friend Sarah- you may remember her from episode two when we had a roundtable discussion. I wanted to bring Sarah back because she is not only funny, but I just love to listen to her talk! In this episode, Sarah and I talk about what it is like to go through difficulty and feel like God is distant. Is He trying to teach me something? Is this happening because I did something wrong? It is so easy to try to rush through difficult circumstances and learn whatever you have to learn to end the struggle when what He really is trying to do is grow your character. Join us as we wrestle through this conversation of “Where is God in the Dark Places?”
We often hear from couples that the service lifestyle has made my spouse “cold, calculated, and harsh.” While this may be a nature versus nurture debate, the service lifestyle can definitely train a person to see the world in a different way. In this episode, Corie and Matt come together to talk about how this doesn’t have to create more conflict in your marriage- in fact, it can be a strength that you lean on! Matt shares how growing up in a first responder home shaped him into the man he is today as well as understanding the internal emotional world of warriors- in our community and military. Join us in a fun and moving discussion on how you can embrace who you are as well as how life has shaped you and become a stronger team together. *** SPOILER ALERT- We talk about Avengers: Endgame in this episode, so please hold off on listening until you have seen it!
Ok- so first a heads up- we are going there in this episode. We will be talking all about the female anatomy! Guys- this one is for you, too. There is so much women are not educated on and the pelvic floor is just one of them. Ashley Gammon, founder of M.O.M.S. (Military Outreach MUTU System) is my guest! After three C-sections of her own, something wasn’t right. She didn’t feel as strong, wasn’t making progress in her fitness goals, and was experiencing a whole lot of symptoms that you are likely experiencing but didn’t know there was help for. Ladies, the trampoline is definitely in your future and so are those HIIT programs and everything else you’ve been avoiding because… let’s be honest. After kids, things just aren’t the same. But Ashley says that none of us have to live that way. If you are interested in taking care of your own body and health again and are ready to reclaim your sex life, that trampoline, and get things back where they originally were, check out: www.mutustrong.com https://themilitarywifeandmom.com/diastasis-recti-mutu-strong-military/ https://militaryspouse.epubxp.com/i/10519 https://armywife101.com/2019/02/military-mamas-want-your-body-back-moms.html https://in-dependent.org/blog/connecting-with-friends-about-womens-health-issues Connect with Corie Weathers! www.life-giver.org www.corieweathers.com Join the conversation and participate in future shows! @CorieLPC
This is the second Sunday Special in Season 4 where we have honest conversations around faith in the midst of the service lifestyle. In this episode, I’m introducing you to Jim and Ashley, an Army chaplain couple, who recently went through one of the most difficult seasons of their life. Shortly after PCSing, Ashley found out she was having identical twins boys about the same time that their two-year-old son began to have seizures. Stretched thin with doctor’s appointments during an already busy season of being stationed at the Chaplain Schoolhouse, they soon found themselves in an overwhelming situation. Listen in as Ashley and Jim share how their faith was challenged as they fought for the lives of their sons. If you are going through a current season of loss, or have in the past, Jim and Ashley’s story will inspire you and encourage you as it has already done for hundreds of families who have watched them from afar.
I could not be more excited to share my good friend, Brittany Boccher with you. She was the 2017 AFI Military Spouse of the Year and has been traveling the country investing in military spouse by helping them define their identity and purpose. Originally, Brittany defined her purpose by advocating for special needs families as she has a son with multiple medical issues. However, she soon found that a bigger issue is plaguing our community- a lack of identity. Brittany continues to advocate for EFMP families, but her passion for helping spouses reclaim who they are and find new purpose has resulted in her partnering with the USO to create a workshop and workbook titled Discovering Your Spark. After the results from my latest survey came back showing the same issue, I knew I had to have Brittany on to talk about not only what she was finding as she sits down with spouses face to face, but also what she has discovered herself is a way to find our way back to ourselves again. Find Brittany also on FB: https://www.facebook.com/discoveringyourspark/
(WATCH or LISTEN to this episode!) Safety and security is more important than ever. In a time where foreign adversaries are actively targeting and using American social media accounts, we need all the help we can get to keep our family and mission safe. In this episode, I bring in my good friend, OPSEC Alex (Alexandra Panaretos) to give us practical advice and tips on personal and operation security. I met Alex in 2015 at the AFI Military Spouse of the Year Awards where we discovered many military spouses, now in the public eye, were targeted by adversaries and being investigated by the FBI. This hit home for so many of us and we realized it was time to take our personal information, including information on our family, seriously. Alex, a former military spouse herself, has made it her mission to educate military families and businesses on digital and personal safety. This episode may be tough to hear, but it is absolutely imperative to share with your friends and family, as well as the military families you serve with. This episode can also be WATCHED on the Youtube link below. Recommended Articles by OPSEC Alex: How to Declutter and Organize Your Personal Tech in a Few Simple Steps What should I do if I think my kid’s device has been hacked? A Traveler’s Guide to OPSEC With just $60, researchers found and tracked NATO troops and even tricked them into disobeying orders
It’s time for the very first Lifegiver Sunday Special. I received feedback that some of you would like faith based content AND hearing from Matt- so this episode is the both of us giving a talk at our old stomping grounds where we first met- Gardner-Webb University. The sound on this one is a bit different because it was recorded in a different place and format, but I hope the message comes through in a way that will encourage your story. Guess what- You can also WATCH this episode as well! Check it out here: I hope that you enjoy this episode. I personally am huge fan of Matt Weathers, so I’m happy to share the stage with him anytime.
What happens when a veteran, a military spouse, and a first responder spouse sit down and talk about life together? I often get asked, do we really have that much in common? Why would I have a podcast where I address the needs of both military and first responders? Because we have a whole lot more in common than you think. In this episode, I bring Ashley and Sarah on the podcast to talk about our different worlds and we would love for you to join us. Sarah is a first responder spouse, whose husband is now on the local SWAT team. She brings authenticity and humor that will brighten anyone’s day. Ashley, calling in from Italy, is a veteran herself by has retired and is now a military spouse. For those who don’t know, we call that a dual service family. She brings a perspective that all of use should pay attention to. Grab a cup of coffee or tea and pretend you are sitting at the table with us. You will definitely be changed by this conversation.
Welcome to the season four premiere of the Lifegiver podcast! I’ve returned from my winter sabbatical with new vision for this year and that includes great plans for season 4. When it all comes down to it, it’s all about YOU. In this first episode, I’ll briefly share about my plans to make the podcast far more interactive in 2019 as well as talking about the results of a spouse survey I created that went viral. Almost 750 spouses told me how they are REALLY doing and it turns out… We have lots to talk about. I wasn’t surprised that we are struggling as a community. Many of you aren’t doing well and you aren’t talking about it. In fact, many are burned out, exhausted, and borderline resentful. So in this episode we are going to get honest about that. But there are some of you who are really doing great. So what is the difference? Take a listen to find out where you fall with other spouses in the community. Perhaps you need some encouragement who are figuring out how to balance it all or maybe you have a lot more to offer than you thought… It’s time to breathe life into our family- the community family as well.