Are blogs dead? That’s the question we’ve been asking at Lifegiver recently. And honestly, I don’t know. More than that, I’m not sure I’m the best one to answer that question.

You see, I am a lover of all things old. Antique furniture, pioneer ways, run-down farm homes…if it’s old and decaying I love it. Lately, I have found myself feeling so nostalgic. From longing for my old hip hugger flares, to missing 90’s wispy big barrel bangs, my heart aches for the past. 

I’m sure in some way or another, after these last two years, yours does too. 

I remember the good ol’ days, before social media really took off, I would sit and read mommy blogs while nursing babies in the middle night. I laughed. I cried. I felt seen and known in the midst of postpartum depression and spit-up sweatpants. But somewhere in the spinning, rushing world of technology and progress those blogs faded away. In their place came to the point, how to’s.

Quick, concise, consumption.

Sure it was nice for a while, and those type of blogs still have their place, but what happened to conversation? 

What happened to contemplation?

Am I the only one tired of the echo chambers and quick fixes? Tired of everyone vying to give me as a consumer want I want versus what I need?

Years ago, I was at the end of my rope with first responder life. It was 2016 and I remember googling “how to be a first responder wife”. You know what came up? Two things. The first, a to the point, three-step approach to packing lunches and getting sweat smells out of duty vests and the other, a very much drama-filled lament of a wife pining for the sound of Velcro in the middle of night so she could rest easy knowing her officer was home. 

My first thought was “I can’t live like that” and so I trudged forward into the unknown of this life determined to not let it destroy everything around me. 

When I look back and think of that woman, the one waiting for the Velcro, I can see past her lament now. Though her words were thick with theatrics, what she was really trying to communicate was that she just wanted to be seen.

She, like myself and many others who have lived this life, was desperate for anyone to see how hard this life can be. How not normal it is and how very lonely and isolating it can all be. 

Does anyone know what it’s like to “hope” you make it to retirement with your serving spouse? 

Does anyone see how often I am alone, the sole bearer of consistency for our children? 

Does anyone feel that even if we physically make it to the end of this career… who in the world will we be? 

We may escape physical harm, but what the heck is this all doing to us psychologically and physiologically??

And mostly, does anyone know how to make a duty vest not smell of sweat?!

First responder life is not for the faint of heart. Especially now. And even if blogging is dead, we as a community are behind the times anyway. For too long we have done this life alone, with little resource and little acknowledgment. We have been unseen. 

My hope is that Lifegiver can breathe life back into the blogosphere, 

Breathe life into the marriages of those who for too long have felt unseen and alone. 

My hope is to bring contemplation and conversation to this lifestyle and offer more than any quick fix consumption could ever give. 

Let’s not forsake the old and broken things, let’s breathe life back into them.